Have you noticed family dynamics seem magnified the longer we socially distance? You’re not alone.
Families around the world are experiencing unprecedented amounts of time together and, for many of us, the struggle is real.
Have you noticed your family dynamics seem exponentially magnified the longer we socially distance? You’re not alone!
Whether it’s heightened sibling conflict, non-stop bickering, anxious thinking, or adjusting to new routines, many parents feel like they don’t have the necessary tools and resources to get through this period of uninterrupted family time.
Here are six ideas for boosting your mental health while at home with your family:
1. Practice self-care
Self-care can sound like a buzzword for overindulging or emotional numbing. As caregivers, we often find it difficult to prioritize our own needs without feeling guilty or selfish. But we need to change our thinking. After all, our ability to stay centered and balanced during this time of global hardship will be critical to our family’s well-being.
Whether you find something that energizes your mind and body or one that relaxes it, doing a small act of self-care each day can help you feel refreshed and ready to help others.
2. Plan for your child’s energy level
Do you have a high-energy kid who thrives on having places to go and things to do? Or is your child a “homebody” who does best with lots of downtimes? Remember, every child will have a different response to social isolation based on their own unique personality traits, temperament, and energy level. Create a daily routine that matches your child’s natural energy to promote consistently positive behavior.
3. Harness sibling rivalry
Are your children becoming more competitive with each passing day? For many families, sibling rivalry is heightened during this time of togetherness. Rather than trying to stop the competitiveness, parents might encourage a little “friendly competition” such as relay races, scavenger hunts, obstacle courses, or treasure hunts.
If you’re feeling really creative, you might even find ways to incorporate housework into these challenges! (Example: “The first person to put on all their dirty clothes, run to the laundry room, and take off their dirty clothes is the winner!”)
4. Limit children’s exposure to news
For many of us, watching the news helps us feel up-to-date and in control during a time when things are very much out of our control. Although we might be comfortable riding the wave of news briefings and global developments, this can lead to more anxiety and uncertainty in some children.
Be mindful of kids’ exposure to information by limiting the amount of time spent watching the news. Depending on your child’s age and developmental level, one or two check-ins per day should be sufficient. If you want more frequent access to information, consider getting updates online to avoid overwhelming children’s ability to cope with current events.
5. Choose screen time wisely
This is understandably probably not the time you’re cutting back on screen time or video games for your kids. But keep in mind that not all games are created equally.
Games that mimic high-intensity situations (such as theft, war, or survival) can actually produce a fight-or-flight response in children. Instead, consider screen activities that foster connection, learning, movement, or problem-solving. Visit www.commonsensemedia.org for expert reviews and hand-picked lists of quality online entertainment for kids.
6. Get creative
Social distancing is stressful and lonely, especially if you can’t be with your children and loved ones. It is especially important to be creative and stay connected during this period of isolation.
You might consider playing games that can be played across screens. For example, Battleship and Catchphrase can be adapted to play virtually over FaceTime or Skype. Send kids on a scavenger hunt around the house, read them stories, or create art projects together. Bring back old games like Pictionary or Charades, ‘I Spy’ or 20 Questions. The most important thing is to find meaningful ways to connect and engage, even from a distance.
Just like caring for our physical health, mental health requires daily attention. Try out these strategies to see which ones help your family during this time.
Reach out for help if you believe your family needs professional support to manage the stress of the COVID-19 crisis. If you or your child are currently working with a therapist, check to see if they offer online ‘telehealth’ therapy. School counselors and previous therapists can also be a valuable resource during this time.
For families that don’t have an existing relationship with a counselor, now is a good time to seek help from community mental health centers such as NAMI-National Association for Mental Illness.
Many couples say they have no secrets from each other and most likely they’re lying. However, there are still some things that should be kept under a hat. Some psychologists ask their clients: “Imagine that your whole life, from the beginning till this moment, was filmed on videotape. Do you agree to show it to your boyfriend?” The answer depends on what we mean by frankness in relations. According to American psychologists, couples where partners hide information from each other that can hurt their soul mate are stronger and happier. So, what does your partner should not know?
He is not the best lover in your life
You have probably had some breathtaking sex adventures in your previous life. So what? Many online brides from Ladadate will prove: it is so rarely happened that sexy machos are good husbands and fathers. Those women who are well aware of this finally choose simply good guys as partners. So you did, right?
You should never tell your boyfriend about your ex-es, especially talk about them with admiration. You should never tell that the ex-boyfriend was more caring or attentive. If a woman compares her man with her ex, it will create a lack of confidence between you. Indeed, good sex can be achieved if both of you want it.
2. Your mother thinks you deserve better
Your mother dreams of her son-in-law to have a yacht and family castle. So what? Is it necessarily mean that you will be happy with such a man? Your parents probably love your boyfriend, especially if they see that you are happy with him.
On the contrary, it does not worth discussing his relatives with him — he did not choose them. Therefore, you should be patient and keep your mouth shut. If relatives are unpleasant in communication, you can try to meet them less often. Tell about it very delicately, so as not to create the impression that you are pushing him against his relatives.
3. You have extra expenditures
Of course, the family budget is a hot topic and you should discuss all the huge expenditures together. However, if you worked hard and saved some money for a brand autumn coat don’t tell your BF about this in detail. Let him be happy for you without thinking of extra-hours you took at the office or money you saved on lunches. Thus, you emphasize he is not able to earn money to meet his girlfriend`s expectations. It will make him less confident and more disappointed.
Loving, sincere, warm relationships and the desire to tell your soulmate every single thing are two different sides of the coin. Before you say anything, make a balanced decision, and let your words be followed by love, tact, and delicacy.
Being in a loving relationship is something that can make a big difference to your life. However, there are lots of people who believe they are in this type of secure relationship only to then find that their partner has been unfaithful. If you are concerned that your partner may be cheating, it is only natural to want to find out one way or another – but how can you do this?
Well, there are various ways in which you can find out more about whether your partner is likely to be cheating or not. If you have suspicions, but you aren’t completely sure, going in and accusing them outright may not be the right step, as it will simply destroy the trust in your relationship. What you can do, however, is to look out for certain signs that indicate if your suspicions are founded. In this article, we will look at some of the indicators to check out.
What You Should Look Out For
So, what signs should you look for when it comes to whether or not your partner may be cheating? One of them is a sudden increase in the number of calls your partner receives or makes. If your partner starts to receive a lot of calls and is cagey about who has been calling, this could be cause for concern. You can find tools that will enable you to determine who was actually calling, such as phone number search tools. If your partner told you it was someone else calling, you may then know that they have lied to you.
Another thing that often changes when someone is cheating is their social media usage and habits. You may have found that, in the past, your partner was very open about using social media sites like Facebook in full view of you, but that suddenly they have started to hide the screen. Or they use devices out of your line of sight. You may also find that they are spending far more time on social media, and you may hear private messages coming in. Another thing you may find is that your partner suddenly turns off the phone screen or shuts the laptop if you walk into the room.
You may also notice a difference when it comes to your partner’s social life and appearance if they are cheating on you. Perhaps your partner was always very casual with their appearance before but has now started to make a real effort. Maybe they have started going out a lot more and are not inviting you along. They may even start doing a lot of late nights at the office – or at least saying there are. All of these things are possible indicators that something may be going on.
Of course, you also need to be mindful that these things do not mean your partner is definitely cheating on you. However, by looking for signs like this, coupled with your gut feeling, you will certainly get a far better idea.
From debuting as a web series with its first two episodes uploaded to YouTube back in 2012, Eastsiders has grown into an Emmy-nominated show with a cult following and three darkly twisted yet hilarious seasons with more to come.
Eastsiders is an LGBTQ+, dark comedy series created by Kit Williamson that follows the turbulent and endearing relationship between Thom (Van Hansis) and Cal (Williams) as they grapple with issues from infidelity and trust to roadblocks in their respective careers as a writer and a photographer. The show also branches out to explore the relationships of their Silver Lake, Los Angeles friends, including Kathy (Constance Wu) and her boyfriend Ian (John Halbach) celebrating their six-month anniversary, making it Kathy’s longest relationship but Ian’s shortest and Quincy (Stephen Guarino), a gay club promoter, and Douglas (William Belli), a drag queen, sparking up a dynamic relationship.
This upcoming season will mark the final installment of the series and have the characters confront the hidden truths within their relationships, from answering questions on how love and commitment manifest into a long-term relationship, to examining the challenges of marriage.
Last week, Downtown Magazine attended a special screening for the new season and had the opportunity to sit down and chat with a few members of the cast, discussing the progression of the show since season one and the success found in crowdfunding the entire series.
Downtown: What do you hope your fans and viewers are going to get out of this season?
Kit Williamson: “For me, I hope that people enjoy a fully realized arc. I hope that they feel that every character’s journey is completed. One of the many reasons that this is the final season is that I believe good stories have endings, and I want to leave all of the characters in a not necessarily a happy place, but in the right place for the journey that we’ve seen them go on for the last seven years.”
John Halbach: “I’m so grateful for everyone for following along with us since 2012. And I hope that we can give everyone who’s been so loyal and amazing and supportive, a good, satisfying conclusion for these characters that I love as much as I hope that they do too.”
Van Hansis: “And I also just want to say that like Eastsiders has always been an ensemble show. And the last season, we went on a deep dive into certain relationships. And this one is so much more about, like, Who are these people as a community? And showing so many different types of relationships. It’s a love letter to the show.”
KW: “It’s a love letter to the characters.”
Downtown: “How is the Season 4 storyline and the way you’re ending the series compare and contrast with how you began the storyline originally in Season 1?”
KW: “The characters have grown up a lot over the last seven years, from being just complete and total methods to sort of having their shit together. But just because you have your shit together in your life doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re going to have your shit together in your relationships. And it’s important to depict that, that relationships are hard, no matter what stage of life that you’re in.”
JH: “The ensemble has grown so much. In the beginning, there were five main characters, you know, there’s what 20 main characters now. *laughs* It’s a much bigger, broader world with different stories and different representations and different relationships. It’s really cool patchwork quilt.”
VH: “Yeah, but there’s also a total through line from who these people were in Season 1 to who they are now. Even if like, we haven’t seen some of them for a couple seasons, like coming back into where their lives are now is really exciting. And it’s also exciting to see that like, everybody is different. Jeremy (Matthew McKelligon) is in a place that I never thought he would be in and seeing somebody like him occupy that space is really exciting.”
Downtown: “How have you seen your show fit into this bigger picture of telling queer people’s stories in more nuanced and complex ways?”
KW: “I think being an independently produced series affords us the freedom to tell stories that are a little bit off the beaten path and to represent characters that don’t necessarily fit into an easily understood box. And when you get into depictions of LGBTQ+ characters on network television, especially, they tend to be flattened, one-sided, and often fall into the tropes of respectability politics, with 2.5 kids and a white picket fence in the suburbs, because they’re trying to make these characters palatable to as many people as possible. But the humanity of these characters is just as valid as the humanity of these kinds of characters that I’m talking about. And we need all kinds of representation, we need representation of LGBTQ+ characters that are flawed and complez, and we need to allow them to fuck up their lives and relationships. Because there is catharsis in that. There is validity in that kind of storytelling as well. We need to represent the full spectrum of the human experience, because that’s what we are as LGBTQ+ people, we are every kind of person, we just happen to be LGBTQ+.”
VH: “I would say one thing that’s really amazing about Eastsiders is that our bottom line is so low, because we’re not an expensive show, we’re a very cheap show. We don’t have a lot of money to work with, with that we get to tell our story in a way that I think that if there’s a ton of money behind it, there’s a bottom line that’s higher. And I think that’s why we outlasted shows from fancy networks, because we haven’t taken much to tell the story. And therefore, the risk is less. So for somebody like that, to be behind us, we get to play a little bit more. Which, you know, it sucks that we don’t have the money that we would love to have. But I guess the flip side of that is that because we don’t have money, we get to play.”
JH: “There’s only been a handful of cases really in the history of television. I think that something really special about ours is that you get to see Thom and Cal in a loving, long-term committed open relationship over seven years and I don’t think I can think of another show where you’ve seen that. There’s been a lot of like wacky three-some episodes or it happens once in a thrown-off way.”
VH: *mocking voice* “What did we do?”
JH: “I remember like David and Keith had a three-some on Six Feet Under but it was just one episode.”
KW: “I put a nod to that in Season 2 actually with the coffee scene.”
JH: “So I think that’s something that stands out about Eastsiders.”
Downtown: “How have how have the characters you play on the screen affect your interpersonal relationships in real life?”
KW: “I think everybody assumes that the show is completely autobiographical, which is hilarious because it’s never autobiographical in the ways that people assume it is and often autobiographical in the ways that nobody assumes. Thom and Cal are not Kit and John, but obviously, as this visible gay couple making this gay show people kind of assume that it’s just our life story put on the screen.I don’t know. How has it impacted your life, darling?”
JH: “I don’t know if it has because my character is so close to me. I mean, it’s written for me by my husband so I don’t know that it has. Except in that I love the cast and I love the crew. And we’ve created a family making the show together. So in that way, it certainly has. But I don’t know if it has affected the way that I behaved as a person in the world.”
VH: “I think as far as my character, we actually talked about this, Kit has put a lot of himself into Thom as well. So it’s not like the Kit and John relationship. Like, Tom is the writer. Kit’s a writer, Kit’s the creator. Kit always has a million things in the fire and that’s one of my favorite things about him. But as far as my personal life, I don’t know, I guess the only thing I can think of is I’ve made some friends that I think I’ll have for life, I hope I have for life., You know, being a part of the show and if they share some of their lives with me, based on how they write for me, that’s an honor.”
Downtown: “You’ve had so much success with crowdfunding the entire series of your show, why do you think your show was so successful in doing so? And do you recommend that more shows should be crowdfunded, esp. as it relates to telling more queer narratives?”
KW: “I really recommend crowdfunding for any content creator, but I think that you need to come to the table having produced something independently and self-financed something first, so that you can provide a proof of concept. You’re not just asking for handouts, you’re asking to continue something that you’re already doing. I believe in crowdfunding, especially for projects like ours that are on unlikely to get greenlit by a traditional studio or network. And that’s one of the reasons why I’m continuing my own crowdfunding journey on Patreon. I’m extremely inspired by people like Amanda Palmer who has over 10,000 patrons on Patreon. Willam has over 4,000. You see, these creators who are creating unconventional work get embraced by the crowd because I think that we have a thirst and hunger as an audience, especially as a queer audience, for unique stories. And mainstream media is not known for its uniqueness. They’re known for getting on the bandwagon well after ideas have taken hold in the public consciousness. So for people who try to be on the avante garde, for people who try to innovate and create new ideas and put new ideas out there and really stick their neck out as storytellers, crowdfunding is an amazing place to be. And I am so grateful to have forged, meaningful and lifelong friendships and relationships with people who I met because they were supporters of my work. Like Jen and Jeff Sarabock, who are here today who began as crowdfunding contributors in Season 1 and are now executive producers on the third and fourth season of the show. And now we’ve become close friends. So it’s amazing to just open up your work, your life. You open yourself up to the goodwill of the internet, amazing things can happen.”
Downtown: “Lastly, do you have any advice for any aspiring screenwriters, actors, and anyone wanting to be in the industry to do what you’ve done? Especially as it relates to creatives in New York City?”
JH: “Yeah, I would say to just make something and get it out there. We meet people all the time who say they want to make a show and then wait. You’ve tried to sell it to HBO and try to sell it to Netflix and sit on it. If you can sell it to HBO or Netflix, great and let’s celebrate you. But I think that you’re probably more likely to find success in sharing your story if you just get out there and share it yourself. I mean, I’m so glad that we ended up on Netflix, but we would have not ended up on Netflix if we hadn’t started out on YouTube. And it has been a journey. So I would recommend that, make it and get it out there.”
KW: “Yeah, almost no one sells their first project HBO or Netflix. Almost no one comes out of the gate with the first idea they’ve ever had, the first thing they put pen to paper becoming a televison show. You’ve got to just create and that begets more creation, more success. And I’d say as it pertains to people in New York City, in particular, New York is actually very independent film friendly, very guerilla filmmaking friendly. We have an episode in season three that we shot almost entirely in New York or primarily in New York. And if you’re shooting on a skeleton crew, you don’t actually have to get permits to shoot and a lot of places in New York, you can go out there with a camera operator and a sound mixer and you can make some beautiful art because you have some incredible, timeless, unique places to shoot in New York City. So just get out there and fucking do it. You have no excuse. Your project can look like a Woody Allen film. Not that I’m endorsing Woody Allen. Though, Annie Hall was an important movie for me, I’m not currently endorsing Woody Allen. But I am saying that you can get out there and make things and take advantage of the artistic community in New York City because it’s it’s incredibly vibrant and unlike any other place.”
Seasons 1, 2 and 3 are available for streaming on Netflix right now. Make sure to catch up with the series before the fourth and final season premieres this summer!
Happy Tuesday! For this trend report, we made it a Valentine’s Day edition since the biggest day of the year for couples is just about here!
Couples can do a variety of things on Valentine’s Day, and since it’s the biggest date night of the year we know you’ll want to look the part. Whether you go to a movie, a fancy dinner or even spend the entire day together, we want you to look absolutely fabulous and as confident as ever.
If you haven’t already, make your Valentine’s Day plans and find an outfit that will make your date speechless.atThese are the five outfits we came up with that we’re sure would be perfect for your date!
Platinum Poire co-founders Rori Sassoon & Dr. Errol Gluck
A VIP, invite-only, power couple service, Platinum Poire aims to create lasting relationships for elite singles. The matchmaking of Platinum Poire is research-based as the company’s vetting of its clients includes background checks, personality testing, and financial analysis. In turn, the Platinum Poire database has a strong reputation of being full of successful and committed individuals.
Platinum Poire was co-founded by Rori Sassoon and Dr. Errol Gluck. Dr. Gluck is revered as the top in the nation for neuroplasticity, while also excelling in the field of executive life coaching. Rori has an extensive background in image consultation and styling. In turn, Rori and Dr. Gluck’s skill-sets complement one another’s, guaranteeing that Platinum Poire’s clients are presenting themselves optimally on all ends.
Downtown spoke with both Rori and Dr. Gluck on the eve of Valentine’s Day. But as the two made clear in our Q&A, matchmaking is a year-round business, not at all centered around Feb. 14. More on Platinum Poire can be found at www.platinumpoire.com, while the company can also be followed on Facebook and Instagram.
Rori Sassoon & Dr. Errol Gluck
How did you two first meet? When did it become obvious that you needed to go into business together?
Rori Sassoon: I came to Dr. Gluck as an executive life-coaching client looking for professional inspiration on my next steps in life after successfully blending two families.
Dr. Errol Gluck: I instantly realized Rori’s high emotional acuity and vivacious spirit and discussions began for forming Platinum Poire. Creating the company had been of great interest for me as throughout my 40-plus years in private practice, I have made over 75 successfully-lasting couples; I knew I had a penchant for matchmaking to say the least. And with Rori as a partner, another match made in heaven was created!
What makes your company different from matchmaking services?
RS: A number of very important factors separate Platinum Poire from other matchmaking companies. First, Dr. Gluck’s long standing experience as a forensic profiler acts as Platinum Poire’s secret weapon. Dr. Gluck’s ability to read people and truly get into their heads, learning their past mistakes, their patterns, their goals quickly assists in forming a well rounded picture of who they would match up with based on their inside. Additionally, Platinum Poire has no expiration for the membership, this is a reflection of a belief in the process of finding real lasting love. Additionally, we offer relationship coaching as we are both qualified as relationship experts. This helps our client’s success in dating, which of course their success is our success.
How did you go about matching people up? What is the sign-up process like?
RS: The process of on-boarding clients begins with our “inquiries” email, at which point potential clients send in a photo and bio in preparation for a phone call where they learn about the history of Platinum Poire and the logistics of membership. From there, the interested party arranges a consultation with me to make certain there is chemistry on both sides and to confirm that Platinum Poire’s existing client base is a good fit for them.
Rori Sassoon & Dr. Errol Gluck
DEG: The next step after a commitment to join is the profiling experience with me, where all notes — which remain confidential — are then used to assist in the actual matchmaking. From there, introductions are done one on one and discreetly via email, there is no online database access for clients.
RS: We have one special couple who are engaged to be married. Their story is significant because of the level of joy that their partnership brought to each other’s lives and family. Rachel was divorced after a 16-year marriage and had three children, one of which was special needs. This fact required her future partner to be a man of exception caliber. We introduced her to Dave, a wonderful kind-hearted man who had never been married and was very eager for a family to bond with. The chemistry was instant thankfully, and in very little time they took the relationship to the next level, building their own loving family unit together.
Is there a peak time of year for what you do? Is it Valentine’s Day?
DEG: Love happens as often and as mystically as death does. There is no peak time in matchmaking.
In general, what do you wish more people knew about dating? Are there particular mistakes that people make that you feel hold them back?
RS: The first mistake people tend to make frequently is to underestimate and/or overestimate themselves and their potential date. Jumping to conclusions too quickly. They need to trust the process.
For you personally, what would an ideal date look like?
RS: I love a day date that turns to an evening date if there’s chemistry. For instance, starting with a tour of a vineyard and ending up at a romantic restaurant.
DEG: The ideal date is shared communication, and a shared experience that is something outside of the box, which then ends in a romantic place without expectations.
What’s coming up for Platinum Poire in the coming months?
RS: Platinum Poire has great things on the horizon. There will be significant media exposure, as well as well attended events which increases the number of new clients, which Platinum Poire potentially absorbs. Platinum Poire is also collaborating with other luxury brands for an opportunity of mutual success.
When not busy with the company, how do you like to spend your free time?
DEG; We both continue the pursuit of the company even well after business hours. It’s a passion for us; there is no clocking out.
RS: It is a constant pursuit of networking at hotspots and researching to spread the seeds of love.
